I’m happy about scanxiety because it is what I deal with on a semi-often basis (like doctor visits, follow-ups, etc.). Most times my issues are well-managed with a combination of exercise, activity, meditation, hypnosis (yes, hypnosis) and positive thinking — oh, and just being soooo busy I can’t find time to think — but sometimes, it hits me bad.
Today, in fact, I woke up with pain in my right armpit and what looked to me like swelling. I don’t stare at my armpits often but this looked weird and after my surgery in 2016 where 25 lymph nodes were removed (5 of which tested positive for cancer) I don’t feel much on my right armpit, chest area like at all…
Waking up with pain could be explained away — since I’m numb, I don’t feel something until it hurts — but the swelling alarmed me.
I emailed Sloan knowing that it’s Thanksgiving week and I just do not have time to take a day to go into them and check (but that I would if I had to — but how to know if I had to?) … a survivor friend of mine had something similar happen in September and she told me she went to her radiation doctor locally to check it out and I had a big lightbulb moment.
My radiation doctor was able to fit me in TODAY, same day as my wakeup panic, and after catching up she checked me out and said that it’s all ok and normal. Normal and unremarkable is all I want to be now, and knowing in a few short days it will be 2 years since my diagnosis, it was that much more important for me to know what was going on as soon as possible.
So yes, I’m thankful for scanxiety though I hate it, too — it is a big part of my new normal and I have to roll with it. Also thankful for my radiation doctor squeezing me in both literally and figuratively lol!