There are so many things I have had to let go — past hurts, past grudges — things I would normally be able to hold onto for decades are now, all gone. I am transparent or as transparent as I can be by sharing my story and being as authentic as I can in life, love and all matters in between.
Sometimes, though, I have a flashback to when I was going through chemotherapy and it hits me hard in the gut how people can be so cruel, so small-minded and so dumb regarding the body’s potential to turn on you and how it can happen to anyone, at any time.
I hate to hold stock in karma and the truth is that I wish bad on no one — I do not have time for that. I have made choices and conscious decisions around letting go and probably not pursuing things that if I did pursue might make my finances less grim.
So turn the other cheek is what I did and continue to do but sometimes, I have a flashback or a nightmare and it hits me that there is evil in everyone — that some people exist to be the villain in their own mind and you know what, I pity them. More importantly, I hope that karma skips them — let them continue to live in ignorance and enjoy their healthy bodies, their two boobs or two balls or whatever and let them know that I pray for them — I pray for them to never experience what I did and that though I am broken and battled, I will always be kind, which is more than I can say for them.