It’s so funny how in-laws are sometimes not always harmonious — been there, done that … as part of the old pre-cancer me I inherited an old rivalry of mom vs. grandma from my own mom. When she moved out, my grandma was there to raise us. My mom always felt like my grandma monopolized our time and even perhaps was the catalyst for her ultimately leaving when I was about 12 or 13.
It was bred in me that a mother-in-law is a threat to a mother’s relationship, despite me not being angry at my own grandma — in fact, nothing could be further from the truth. I was not mad, I was devastated when she passed away when I was 23 years old, and I miss her every day still.
This does not change the fact that I also love my mom — though anyone will tell you we are more like best friends than mother and daughter.
So all of this history really screwed with me — until cancer. I will say that my mother-in-law and I are freakishly alike in many ways and that in a way my husband married his mother (it’s ok — despite trying really hard NOT to I think I kind of married my father — how to break this cycle for my kids I just don’t know…)
I am thankful for my mother-in-law — our history is crazy — we have had huge ups and downs but she (and my father-in-law, may he rest in peace) always have been there for us in so many ways.
During my recent convalescence post-ovary-and-tube removal, I have been struggling hard. My mother-in-law stayed for as many days as she could and while here she kept the children busy, slept with them downstairs so I could sleep at night, cleaned my whole house (including my fridge and windows), did alll of my laundry (there was a lot) and cooked and fed the people who are always hungry in my house.
She was only supposed to stay 1-2 nights but took pity on my as I hobbled around with intense pain written all over my face. I am thankful to call her mom — though we do still drive each other crazy. That’s normal :).